Life Plans Are Bullshit

Let me start off by saying that not all life plans are bullshit.

I'm talking about those plans your teachers and principals waved dramatically in your face during Grades 11 and 12. Those plans your parents and colleagues and random strangers at the supermarket would 'suggest' you make now that you're in your mid-20's. The plans that society claims will lead you to happiness and fulfilment and unicorns that pooped rainbows, and encourage you to "Try them all!"

The plans I'm talking about are those that others want to make FOR you, not those you plan for yourself.

Throughout high school, it was the same deal:

(1) Get a brilliant OP.

(2) Pick a university course.

(3) Graduate with flying colours.

(4) Get a job in the field.

(5) Work forever.

Never mind that you're 17 years old and you can't even name your all-time favourite film, let alone choose a course you can tolerate for 3 - 4 years. Did I know what I wanted to be at 17? Nope. I was too busy reading fantasy novels and mucking around on Facebook.

The worst part is, this life planning continues AFTER you finish a degree or course you like. Then it looks something like this:

(1) Find a boyfriend or girlfriend.

(2) Get engaged.

(3) Get married.

(4) Buy a house.

(5) Have 10 mini humans.

I'm 27 and began my first "grown up" relationship a year or so ago. Not even two weeks in and my work mates were asking me: "Is he marriage material?" "Reckon you'll move in together?" "Have you photo-shopped your faces together to see what your babies would look like?"

I mean, seriously people. Get a freakin' grip.

Of course, the most frustrating of all life planning is that which society declares will 'complete you.' Often that includes the things I've already listed, but it also might say:

(1) Have a high-paying job.

(2) Get rich.

(3) Own everything.

(4) Do everything by the time you're 30.

(5) Retire a millionaire.

(Alright, the last few might be a bit ridiculous, but you get my drift).

My point is: Life plans are bullshit.

Life can be unpredictable. It's also messy and silly and random. What you want from life can't be determined by anyone but you. Am I saying you should never plan anything? Absolutely not. Having direction initiated by goals is healthy. Do you need to know everything you're going to do until you die? No way.

I'm tired of being asked what I'm going to do next, as if I own some mystical crystal ball and can see the future. I have passions. I have dreams. I have a general idea of where I want to be in 10 years time. But I'm not setting my life story in cement. I'm allowing myself the freedom to be flexible. Likewise, I don't need money or possessions to complete me. If I decide I want to be a millionaire, kudos to me - but I wouldn't chase it in my desire to be happy. I think you need to be content with what you have now, and not feel less of a person because your plan doesn't revolve around the big bucks.

In saying that, I recognise that some people know what they want from a young age and they plan the heck out of their lives - dotting i's and crossing t's day in and day out. That's fine and good and all the best to them if that's what they've decided for themselves. My issue is with the notion that everyone should be like that.

If I do eventually have kids someday, I'm going to encourage them to work out what they want, in their own time. I'd like them to know it's okay to change your mind and take a different road, so long as it's your decision to do so. I'd also suggest they ignore what their teachers, principals, colleagues, bosses, random strangers and television ads tell them to do, and do what they feel is right for them. Make plans, but don't be afraid to mix it up if that's what makes you happy.

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